Thank you!

----- Original Message ----
Sent on: Friday, May 8, 2009 8:47 AM

Hi Jim,

I don't mind if you use my essay.

Thanks,

Sergei

----- Original Message ----
Sent on: Tuesday, May 5, 2009 9:03 AM

Hi, Sergey,

Below is your graded Essay #1. Well done!

Overeating

I am continuously losing a battle, the battle in which I try to win over myself but constantly give in to the temptation. My problem might sound bizarre and pathetic to some people, but I am not able to overcome it on my own. I have an addiction. The brown, delicious, heavenly-taste chocolate muffins are talking to me. They do not just talk to me occasionally, they talk to me on daily basis, (< a comma splice error so use a semicolon here) in fact, they talk to me throughout the whole day. They ask me to indulge them with a full glass of whole milk and I give in every single time. The unfortunate thing is that this problem can lead to obesity, disappointing my wife, and most of all, a problem that can set a bad example for my little daughter.

A wonderful introduction, Sergey!

I do not care for blueberry or poppy seed muffins; it is the chocolate ones that talk to me. They talk to me at the store, they talk to me at work, and they talk to me while I am sitting on a couch. Somehow, it became a routine and I am eating up to three muffins a day. It is not an exaggeration that I know which places in Spokane sells the best muffins. I have learned all the prices, and I even memorized the days when they are freshly baked. In the past year, I have gained thirty pounds from eating chocolate muffins. If this habit does not stop, I am at high risk of becoming overweight in the near future.

Last night, my wife confronted me and told me that she was very concerned about my muffin intake. We had a long talk – my wife addressed her concern about me being overweight and how much she cared for my health. I was amazed that she did not blame me for overeating but rather suggested several things we can do to change my habits. First of all, she took my Costco card away from me so I could not buy the 12-pack of chocolate muffins anymore. Second ~~of all~~, in order for me to get back into shape, she offered to go for walks with me every other day to burn off those extra pounds. If I promise not to buy my own muffins, she assured that I could still have up to three muffins a week at home.

Although it seems like a good plan to me, I know it will be a challenge. However, I am going to challenge myself to overcome this bizarre addiction to chocolate muffins for the sake of my daughter. As my wife said, there is no better time to make this change then (than) before our daughter is born. I will have to be a better example for our daughter and indulging these empty calories will just show her that it is an okay thing to do. I want my daughter to be healthy and the only way I can ensure that to happen is by being a positive role model.

It is amazing how something as simple as chocolate muffins can take control over someone’s life, and I am going to fight hard to win this battle. I am blessed that my wife will be there to support me and I truly believe that together, we can overcome this problem. I want to be healthy. I do not want to disappoint my wife, and I want to be a good example for my little girl. I will not start working on this problem tomorrow; I will start today – right now.

Sergey, you wrote a very fine essay! My weakness was the Costco muffins, too, but I was addicted to the maple-drizzle little bundles of temptation.

Would you agree to let me use this essay as an example in future classes? I can keep it anonymous if you would like.

Jim-) Grade 98/100

----- Original Message ----
Sent on: Sunday, May 3, 2009 9:22 PM

Overeating

I am continuously losing a battle, the battle in which I try to win over myself but constantly give in to the temptation. My problem might sound bizarre and pathetic to some people, but I am not able to overcome it on my own. I have an addiction. The brown, delicious, heavenly-taste chocolate muffins are talking to me. They do not just talk to me occasionally, they talk to me on daily basis, in fact, they talk to me throughout the whole day. They ask me to indulge them with a full glass of whole milk and I give in every single time. The unfortunate thing is that this problem can lead to obesity, disappointing my wife, and most of all, a problem that can set a bad example for my little daughter.

Last night, my wife confronted me and told me that she was very concerned about my muffin intake. We had a long talk – my wife addressed her concern about me being overweight and how much she cared for my health. I was amazed that she did not blame me for overeating but rather suggested several things we can do to change my habits. First of all, she took my Costco card away from me so I could not buy the 12-pack of chocolate muffins anymore. Second of all, in order for me to get back into shape, she offered to go for walks with me every other day to burn off those extra pounds. If I promise not to buy my own muffins, she assured that I could still have up to three muffins a week at home.

Although it seems like a good plan to me, I know it will be a challenge. However, I am going to challenge myself to overcome this bizarre addiction to chocolate muffins for the sake of my daughter. As my wife said, there is no better time to make this change then before our daughter is born. I will have to be a better example for our daughter and indulging these empty calories will just show her that it is an okay thing to do. I want my daughter to be healthy and the only way I can ensure that to happen is by being a positive role model.

It is amazing how something as simple as chocolate muffins can take control over someone’s life and I am going to fight hard to win this battle. I am blessed that my wife will be there to support me and I truly believe that together, we can overcome this problem. I want to be healthy. I do not want to disappoint my wife, and I want to be a good example for my little girl. I will not start working on this problem tomorrow; I will start today – right now.